CURIOUS TIMES: Trippy News from a Dysfunctional Planet

Curious Times No. 395
April 5, 2007

BAA BAA BAAD IDEA
Scientists have created the world’s first human-sheep hybrid which has the body of a sheep but organs which are half-human. The animal was created by using a technique which involves injecting human cells into a sheep’s foetus, resulting in an animal with 85 per cent sheep cells and 15 per cent human cells. While medical scientists hope this technique will pave the way to grow vital organs in animals which will be transplantable to humans, other scientists warn that “silent viruses” -- which are harmless in animals -- may create new diseases if they are introduced into the human race. Dr Patrick Dixon, an international lecturer on biological trends, warned: "Many silent viruses could create a biological nightmare in humans. Mutant animal viruses are a real threat, as we have seen with HIV." (The Mail)

THE LAND IS CHEAP BUT THE AMENITIES ARE AWFUL
An appeals court in China has upheld a ban on selling land on the moon in a decision against a company which managed to turn a quick profit of over $2000 by selling 49 acres of moon land in only three days back in 2005. The Chinese government quickly revoked their license and served the company a stiff $8000 fine in order to put them out of business. Last week the appeals court upheld the ban, quoting an international treaty signed in 1983 which read, in part: “outer space, including the moon and other celestial bodies, is not subject to national appropriation by claim of sovereignty, by means of use or occupation, or by other means.” (Xinhua News)

I’LL STOP PROCRASTINATING TOMORROW

If you’ve been putting off going to the doctor to check out something that feels wrong in your body get a load of this hideous photo of a guy in China who discovered a growth in his neck in 1990 but didn’t bother to go to the doctor until the tumor grew to over 35 pounds and he began to resemble Jabba the Hutt. Ughh... (Metro.co.uk)

ANY EXCUSE TO STUDY COLLEGE GIRLS IN BIKINIS
Soon after you finish university you’ll realize that all your brilliant ideas aren’t going to change the world. At that point you’ll begin trying to figure out how to use your smarts to get closer to cute members of the opposite sex. And then you’ll start working on studies like this one from the American Psychological Association titled “ That Swimsuit Becomes You: Sex Differences in Self-objectification, Restrained Eating and Math Performance,” which discovered that college girls who were asked to wear a swimsuit for 10 minutes while performing math problems did much worse than girls wearing a sweater. (The Australian News)

HOW TO MAKE ENEMIES AND ALIENATE PEOPLE, LESSON 1
Once again science confirms what we already know. A study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology makes it official: constantly nagging someone to do what you want doesn’t work, as the person you are harassing will automatically rebel in order to assert their autonomy. And the more controlling you are, concludes the study, the more the individual will do exactly the opposite of what you want. (ABC News)

IS THERE A DOGGY IN THE HOUSE?
A woman in Maryland was saved from choking to death when her dog gave her a doggy-style version of the Heimlich maneuver. After getting a chunk of apple lodged in her throat and beginning to choke, Debbie Parkhurst says her dog Toby “pushed me to the ground, and once I was on my back, he began jumping up and down on my chest.” That did the trick, dislodging the apple and saving the woman’s life. (Yahoo News)

DOES HISTORY SUCK?
I found a strange website called “Does Today Suck?” on which someone with far too much time on his hands will, for the next year, review all of the major news events which happened on each day in history and rank that day as cool, good, bad, or horrible as far as historical performance is concerned. Check it out at DoesTodaySuck.blogspot.com.

BECAUSE WITH ALL THE POWER OF THE UNIVERSE AT HIS DISPOSAL, GOD IS SO BORED THAT HE CHOOSES TO TORTURE PUNY HUMANS FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER, AMEN
In case modern society and a scientific education have knocked childish ideas out of your head, the Pope himself has taken it upon himself to remind you of what you’re missing. “Hell really exists and is eternal, even if nobody talks about it much anymore,” the Pope told a throng of his worshippers in Rome last week. He went on to warn that sinners really do burn in an everlasting fire after they die. (The Times)

I-READ-IT-ON-THE-INTERNET-SO-IT-MUST-BE-TRUE FACT OF THE WEEK
45 per cent of married women would allow their husbands to have sex with Nicole Kidman.