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June 1, 2000


GETTING READY FOR ALIEN INVASION

The Boston Globehas published a story that has been called "the first serious coverage of the UFO phenomena by the mainstream press in America." The story concerns a report written by the French military‹"UFOs and Defense: What Should We Prepare For?"‹that claims UFOs are real and that the military should prepare for them in order to avoid "unnecessary confusion, misapplication of forces, or possible catastrophic consequences." The report was written by extremely high-level members of the French establishment, including a four-star general, a three-star admiral, an air force commander, an air force fighter pilot, the national chief of police, and various scientists and engineers. The three-year, 90-page study concludes that "numerous manifestations observed by reliable witnesses could be the work of craft of extraterrestrial origin." The authors claim that five per cent of UFO sightings "seem to be completely unknown flying machines with exceptional performances that are guided by a natural or artificial intelligence." The French report goes on to chastise the United States for its "impressive repressive arsenal" concerning UFOs, including its disinformation campaigns and its military laws which prohibit the release to the public and the media of any data about "those objects which are not explainable." Although the report urges military preparedness for UFOs, it goes on to say that UFOs have demonstrated no hostile acts, "although intimidation maneuvers have been confirmed," including "visits above secret installations and military bases," and "military aircraft shadowed" in the United States.


CHUPACABRA CAPTURED?

The Chilean newspaper Diario El Sur has reported two more eyewitness sightings during an attack by a 'beast' that has come to be known as the Chupacabra. The May 13 attack on 24 hens is the latest in a month-long killing spree by the creature. On May 15, another newspaper, Cronica, claimed that three Chupacabra had been captured by the Chilean army and turned over to America's FBI. Cronica reported "Radio Padahuel and TV Channel 13 transmitted news reports indicating that a family of strange creatures-possible 'Chupacabras'-had been found by military personnel...police sources told Cronica that the capture of the specimens was real and that everything had transpired as was originally told on Radio Paduhuel."


IF YOU WANT THINGS DONE RIGHT, YOU HAVE TO DO THEM YOURSELF‹UNLESS YOU NEED A PARACHUTE MADE

The first hijacking in the Philippines since 1982 ended well for passengers after the plane landed safely in Manila. Things didn't go quite as smoothly for the hijacker, however, as he jumped out of the plane and landed horrifically on solid ground after his home-made parachute fell off his body. (Reuters)


I SEE DEAD PEOPLE

This week's choice for some disturbing viewing goes to www.celebritymorgue.com, which boasts photographs of freshly deceased famous people. Some of the stiffs include Mother Theresa, Adolf Hitler (or someone who looks like a dead Hitler, anyway), Pol Pot, John F. Kennedy, Marilyn Monroe, Kurt Cobain and Jesse James.


COLD ENOUGH FOR YOU?

The world record for survival from the lowest human body temperature was broken last May, when Ann Bagenholm of Sweden accidently skied into a freezing mountain stream and was trapped under a sheet of ice for one hour and 20 minutes. By the time rescuers got her to the hospital, she had no detectable pulse and her body temperature was down to 13.6°C (56.5°F) instead of the mormal 37°C (98.6°F). Miraculously, she survived, beating the previous record held by a Canadian girl who in 1994 was accidently locked out of her home for six hours, and whose body temperature had plunged to 14.2°C. (Daily Mail)


PLAIN OLD ZEALOUS NOSE PICKING IS OK

According to the book I'm Afraid, You're Afriad: 448 Things to Fear and Why, "over-zealous" nose-picking can rupture the nasal membrane and create a blood clot in the brain, which can lead to death. Careful.


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Copyright 2000 by Andreas Ohrt (604) 803-7485
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com