Curious
Times No. 340
March 16, 2006
STAY
AWAKE AND KILL!
The Pentagon has launched a bizarre series of medical experiments
in its effort to find ways to keep soldiers and pilots awake and
alert for up to five days at a time. Along with the much-publicized
"go pills" (amphetamines) which are already routinely
given to army and airforce personnel, the mission to create an
"Extended Performance War Fighter" includes employing
advanced genetics and neurological science to keep fighters awake.
One of the strangest technologies in development is an electromagnetic
"zapper" which could keep a human brain awake. Research
at Columbia University in New York has found that there is a small
area of the brain above the left ear that can be zapped with electromagnetic
energy in order to keep a person awake and alert. Before and during
missions pilots and soldiers could simply be zapped, and their
need for sleep would be greatly diminshed. (The Telegraph)
THE
END OF THE WORLD WILL LAST SEVERAL MINUTES
The Nigerian government has launched an educational campaign urging
people not to panic during the upcoming solar eclipse which will
darken some parts of that country on March 29. An eclipse five
years ago sparked riots in the northern Nigerian state of Borno
with many blaming "evil people" for the darkening of
the skies. The government advises that citizens may feel "psychological
discomfort" during the eclipse, but assures them that no
real damage will be done. (Yahoo News)
THAT’S
TOO BAAAAD
A couple in Massachusetts has lost their lawsuit which asked for
compensation due to "loss of companionship" after a
neighbour's dog killed their seven pet sheep. The judge ruled
that the legal definition of "companionship" only referred
to humans, but the couple argued that the sheep were their "babies."
According to court testimony, the husband and wife team spent
six to seven hours a day with their sheep, gave them names, celebrated
their birthdays with special food and balloons, baked snacks for
them, bottle-fed them and let them live in their house whenever
the sheep got bored of the backyard. (Springfield Union-News)
WAR
STINKS
India's Uttar Predesh Cow Protection Commission has advised people
that holy cow dung may be able to help protect them from the effects
of radiation burn and nuclear fallout in the event of a nuclear
was with Pakistan. The Commission, which normally focuses on preventing
the eating of India's holy cows and promoting the use of cow dung
and urine as medicinal agents, has now included protection from
nuclear war on its list of magical powers which cow shit possesses.
"Even if the enemy carries out the threat to bomb us with
nukes we don't have to panic. You can fully protect yourselves
by covering the roof with cow dung. Applying cow dung paste to
the body from head to toe will serve as an extra shield,"
promises a spokesman from the group. (Eightball Magazine)
AN
END TO ANNOYING COMPUTER BUGS
A computer programmer in Thailand has created an incredibly popular
piece of software which repels mosquitos by emitting sound waves
through the computer speakers to annoy pests. The original software
was so popular, being downloaded over 50,000 times in the first
three days, that he decided to upgrade the software to also repel
cockroaches and rats. The upgraded software is called Anti-Mal
2.0, and can be downloaded at thaiware.com. Despite some complaints
from users that the original software caused headaches, he claims
that the frequencies used on the new program for rats and cockroaches
are undetectable by humans and dogs. (CNN)
LIVING
IN DENIAL
A new Harris poll out of the States reveals that over two thirds
of Americans believe in hell, but only about 1 per cent believe
that they will actually end up there. The poll also found that
82 per cent of Americans believe in heaven, and most of those
fully expect they'll be getting through those pearly gates. Good
luck! (NBC)
SHUT
THAT DAMN KID UP
A Spanish inventor claims to have deciphered the screams of babies
and has created an electronic device which will tell parents why
their child is crying. Pedro Monaga says he has studied over 100
babies, including his own, and has identified five distinct types
of crying, indicating whether a baby is hungry, bored, tired,
stressed or uncomfortable. His gadget, called "Why Cry,"
will begin selling in Spain this month for about US$93. (Reuters)
I-READ-IT-ON-THE-INTERNET-SO-IT-MUST-BE-TRUE
FACT OF THE WEEK
In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II was named an “Honorary
Harlem Globetrotter.”
Click
here to join the Curious Times e-mail list and get all the Bizarro
News direct to your inbox each week.
