Curious
Times No. 334
February
2, 2006
THE MOST EXPENSIVE VOMIT ON EARTH
The next time you see a disgusting lump of vomit lying on the
beach instead of just trying not to step in it you might want
to take it home and have it analyzed by a marine biologist. Why’s
that, you ask? Because an Australian couple stand to earn a cool
quarter million dollars for a lump of whale vomit which they found
on a beach in South Australia. The technical word for what they
found is called ambergris, which also goes by the nickname “floating
gold” and is an extremely rare material used in perfumes.
Ambergris begins its life as foul-smelling waste matter vomited
up by sperm whales, but years of exposure to sun and salt water
as it floats in the ocean transforms it into sweet smelling ingredient
for perfumes which fetches up to $20 a gram, making the 30 pound
lump found by the Australian couple worth up to $295,000. (BBC)
WHO SAID MODERN DENTISTRY IS PAINLESS?
The only thing worse than having your cavities drilled out by
a dentist is having your cavities drilled out by someone who isn’t
a dentist. So the next time you have a checkup make sure your
dentist’s name matches the diploma on the wall... or risk
being worked on by the dentist’s lover. Unfortunately this
was the sad fate of over 600 patients in the United Kingdom who
had their dental work done by the boyfriend of a dentist who now
faces a two-year sentence thanks to her horrific negligence. The
General Dental Council found that Dr. Mojgan Azari had allowed
her boyfriend to drill out cavities without anaesthetic and improperly
install expensive fillings on over 600 patients between 2002 and
2003. As well as torturing hundreds of victims, the health service
calculated that fixing their dental work has cost the agency around
$317,000. (MSNBC)
BUT I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!
When can you be put in jail for not committing murder? When you’ve
been paid to do the dirty deed but decide to spend the money on
a vacation with your wife instead. So goes the tale of Kevin Reeves,
who was paid a total of £20,000 by Christine Ryder, a suicidal
woman who wanted him to kill her. At first Reeves promised to
hire a professional killer to do the job, but then kept asking
for more money when the hitmen didn’t show up for work. Finally,
Reeves promised to personally kill Ryder for a little bit more
cash, but then he spent the money on a holiday with his wife while
Ryder continued to live. Finally, she took him to court where
he was charged with breach of contract and sentenced to 15 months
in prison. Meanwhile, Ryder still lives, and was compensated £2,000
for her ordeal. (London
Times)
THE DEFINITION OF BURNING LOVE
An Austrian man who must have been really stoned decided to use
220 candles to create a huge flaming heart on the floor of his
living room in order to impress his girlfriend. Unfortunately,
the plan can only be considered a success if his girlfriend is
impressed by stupidity. After lighting his artwork, Hannes Pisek,
20, went to pick up his lover from work and bring her home to
show off his romantic gesture. And I’m sure you can guess
how this one ends... by the time they got back firefighters were
on the scene trying to save what was left of his apartment. (Ananova)
CHUCK NORRIS WILL HUNT YOU DOWN IF YOU DON’T READ THIS
And now, from what must be Chuck Norris’ favourite website,
www.chucknorrisfacts.com,
some little know facts about Chuck Norris: 1. Chuck Norris’
tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
2. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice. 3. Crop circles
are Chuck Norris’ way of telling the world that sometimes
corn needs to lie the fuck down. 4. There is no chin behind Chuck
Norris' beard. There is only another fist. 5. Chuck Norris is
the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
JUST BE GRATEFUL YOUR FATHER WASN’T FRANK ZAPPA
Bob Geldof’s daughter Peaches has come out with a plea for
famous people to stop giving their kids stupid names. “I
hate ridiculous names, my weird name has haunted me all my life,
said Peaches Honeyblossom Michelle Charlotte Angel Vanessa Geldof,
who urged celebrities to quit ruining their children’s lives.
Peaches was also speaking on behalf of her three sisters: Fifi
Trixabelle, Pixie and Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lilly.
THE TRUTH IS IN THERE
And now it’s time for more hidden secrets revealed in anagrams,
courtesy of IlluminatiNews.com.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: he’s grown large n’ crazed. Jennifer
Aniston: fine in torn jeans. Justin Timberlake: I’m a jerk,
but listen . Monty Python’s Flying Circus: strongly psychotic,
I’m funny. Adolph Hitler: hot rapid hell. The Olsen Twins:
new tits n’ holes. Jesus Christ and the disciples: reject
as childish stupidness. How the West Was Won: What we shot we
owns! The American Dream: meet a dear, rich man. United States
of America: dine out, taste a Mac, fries.
“I READ IT ON THE INTERNET SO IT MUST BE TRUE” FACT
OF THE WEEK
90 million people flush their toilet during the SuperBowl half-time.
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