Curious
Times No. 297
May
19, 2005
WHAT WOULD JESUS SMOKE?
An article in High Times magazine argues that Jesus Christ may
have used a cannabis-based anointing oil in order to help cure
people of such ailments as skin diseases, eye problems, menstrual
problems and even epilepsy. Author Chris Bennet says that his
conclusions are based on scriptual texts and claims that the medical
use of cannabis during the time of Christ is supported by archaeological
records. “The holy anointing oil, as described in the original
Hebrew version of the recipe in Exodus, contained over six pounds
of keneh-bosum - a substance identified by respected etymology,
linguists anthropologists, botanists and other researchers as
cannabis extracted into about six quarts of olive oil along with
a variety of other fragrant herbs,” claims Bennet. Researchers
believe that the keneh-bosom extract, which is absorbed into the
body when placed on the skin, could have helped cure people of
a variety of physical and mental problems. (BBC)
EVERY DAY SHOULD BE ORGASM DAY
After years of orgasmic celebrations, the Brazilian town of Espertantina
has finally made it official: from now on, May 9 will be known
as Orgasm Day. “We’re celebrating orgasm in all its
senses,” said the town’s mayor Felipe Santolia. “There’s
even a panel discussion on premature ejaculation.” Apparently
the town has been celebrating Orgasm Day for many years now, but
the former mayor had vetoed an attempt to make it an official
municipal holiday. That’s changed now thanks to Santolia,
who explained that “I’m 32, single and I have an open
mind.“ Orgasm Day celebrations will include panel discussions
by sexologists, a presentation of the play “The Vagina Monologues,”
and, one hopes, plenty of orgasms among the common folk. (Yahoo
News)
THE
GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE LAWN
Now that the Star Wars merchandising machine is gearing up for
one last glorious kick at the can, you can buy virtually anything
with the face of your favourite character slapped on it. Among
the cheap plastic crap top marks for cheesiness has got to go
to the Darth Vader Sprinkler. “Let the Dark Side defend your
lawn from the ravages of summer heat... this great new Vader sprinkler
spins around with water spraying action, wielding his lightsaber
in a furious battle to save your lawn!” (www.shop.starwars.com)
HERE’S YOUR WEEKLY CASE OF THE WILLIES
And now a friendly Curious Times tourist alert. The next time
you travel to Thailand make sure you protect all your orifices...
from flies. Last week saw not one but two cases of flies laying
their eggs inside the heads of Thai people. The first happened
to an 84-year-old man who had to have 50 maggots removed from
his ear after doctors discovered that a fly decided to use the
man’s skull as a new home for her babies. The man had suffered
from intense itching of his ear which he couldn’t stop. After
scratching his ear so aggressively that his eardrum ruptured and
started bleeding, the man finally went to see the doctor who was
forced to use tweezers and a suction device to remove the critters
from his ear. Meanwhile, a 38-year-old woman had surgery performed
to remove 34 maggots from inside her nasal cavity after going
to her doctor with complaints of a swollen cheek. “Probably
while she was sleeping, a fly went up her nose and laid its eggs,
which then hatched into larvae,” speculated her doctor. (Reuters
/ Iol.za.ca)
YOU ARE GETTING HORNY
Strange research into the power of suggestion from the University
of Missouri has discovered that the mere thought of booze influences
the sex drive of college kids. The experimenters first questioned
82 undergrad men about how alcohol affected their libido, and
then flashed words and jumbled letters at them on a computer screen.
The control group was exposed to random words while the other
group was flashed a group of words which included the words beer,
whisky, martini and other alcohol-related suggestions. The men
were then asked to rate photographs of women on a scale of one
to nine. Oddly enough, the men who believed that alcohol increased
their sex drive rated the photos more favourably after subconsciously
viewing alcohol cue words while the men who expected alcohol to
reduce their sexual performance rated the women as less attractive.
Ronald Friedman, the psychologist who ran this experiment has
been studying how words can affect our behavior, and claims that
another experiment found that flashing words such as “old
age” and “bingo” at students caused them to walk
more slowly down the school’s hallways. (Nature)
WHAT’S NEXT, A STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN?
The insane idea of building an elevator to space just keeps getting
more real. The latest news comes from a company in Washington
state which says it will open a plant this summer to manufacture
the nanotube fibers which will be used to build an eight-inch
wide tube stretching from an ocean platform to 62,000 miles into
space. After completion a robot will crawl up and down the elevator
transporting satellites and eventually people into orbit. (CBS
News)
GET OFF YOUR ASS AND WASH SOMETHING
A Spanish inventor, obviously fed up with doing all the laundry
in his home, has invented a washing machine that prevents the
same person from doing laundry two times in a row. The “Your
Turn” washing machine is hooked up to a scanner which reads
your fingerprints and will only begin working if a different user
is scanned than the last load. Inventor Pep Torres created the
gadget in response for a request from a Spanish company for an
innovative Father’s Day gift. Torres calls it the perfect
gift for the “macho man from the ice age who doesn't do anything
around the house except drink beers." (BBC)
Copyright
2005 by Andreas Ohrt
