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Curious Times No. 231
February 12, 2004BACK OFF, CREEP
While Sweden tries to criminalize sex with animals in order to protect pets from sexual assault (see last week’s Curious Times), sometimes nature simply takes its proper course by arming animals with sharp teeth and claws. A Thai man found out the hard way last week that sex with animals is against the laws of nature when he was mauled and bitten on the face, chest and arms by a dog he was trying to rape. Toryip Rawang, 33, told police that he had been extremely drunk and was highly aroused but couldn’t afford a prostitute. He then claims that he spotted a stray dog wagging its tail and "acting sexy" so he pulled it into the bushes and tried to have his way with her. After a brief scuffle the man ran away, staggering home covered in bloody cuts and bruises. (AAP)LIFE’S RUFF
And in another strange tale of people who love animals a little bit too much, a Nepalese man died just three days after marrying his dog in the hopes that it would bring him good luck. (Ananova)NO MORE BORING WORKOUTS
While most of us consider sex to be our weekly aerobic workout routine, a gym in London has taken the concept one step further by combining sex and exercise in a workout that is designed to increase the frequency, intensity and quality of customer’s orgasms. "The Shag Workout" relies on a combination of Tantric sex skills, relaxation, and visualization techniques in order to help women achieve multiple orgasms and help men prolong their climax during sex. For all members, the class promises to develop sexual technique, confidence and endurance. Richard Hilton, creator of the Shag Workout, claims that 25% of the women in his class have reported experienced multiple orgasms, and some participants claim to have had an orgasm during the workout routine. Sounds like a good place to pick up hot chicks! (The Mirror UK)IDIOT OR UBERIDIOT?
Since I’ve spent the past three years taking as many shots at Dubya as possible in this column, I thought it was only fair to point you to sophists.org, where some wise guy has written a pretty decent defense of my least favourite American president of all time. The post, titled "George Bush: Idiot or Ubermensch?" believes Bush could be favourably compared to what Nietzshe called the Ubermensch or "overman." The article claims that Bush "has the power to affect history indefinitely. It is only natural that a man with so much power would discharge this power in the form of violence." And for all those who poke fun at Bush’s lack of intelligence, the writer of this post asks "What the hell have you done that’s so great? (Bush) has countless responsibilities and the world’s eyes are on him at all times, watching his every move. You, on the other hand, probably have difficulty with trivial problems like paying your own bills or maintaining a healthy relationship." So there! (sophists.org)LET THE CONSPIRACY THEORIES BEGIN!
While on the topic of politics, if you still believe that living in a democracy means freedom of choice, head on over to www.rense.com for lots of links to great articles about the ties that bind all of the front-runners in the current presidential race. Most blatantly, it turns out that all the leading Democratic Party candidates went to the same school as George W. Bush. Back in the sixties, John Kerry, Howard Dean and Joseph Lieberman all studied at Yale. And if you were surprised by John Kerry’s sudden rise to prominence, don’t be. It turns out that Kerry belonged to the Order of the Skull and Bones, that secretive power-mad society at Yale which seems to pick and groom our future leaders. But of course the conspiracy goes much deeper than this. Yes, Virginia, there are power brokers behind the scenes who control who you vote for, and they’re not nice people. Check it out for yourself at www.rense.com.NEVER UNDERESTIMATE YOUR NEED FOR A GETAWAY DRIVER
Three streakers in Spokane, Washington, were left to freeze their balls off on a chilly winter night after someone drove off with their car and their clothes. Police report that the three young friends, dressed only in running shoes and baseball caps, streaked through a Denny’s restaurant for cheap thrills. While they ran through the diner, a customer spotted their car still running in the parking lot, and jumped in and took off. The three gave chase, but ended up huddling together in the parking lot while they waited for police to arrive. (Seattle Post-Intelligencer)PAIN IN THE ASS
Did I ever tell you how much I hate commercials that ruin great old songs? It’s not so bad when some innocuous car ad is backed by some bland tune by some no-name band. But commercials cross the line when, for example, they hawk a retarded floor sweeper to the tune of Devo’s "Whip It." And now that Johnny Cash is dead, I guess nobody is fearing his wrath. Yes, it’s true. The makers of Preparation H are in negotiations with the owners of Johnny Cash’s music to use the song "Ring of Fire" in their next ad campaign. (tennessean.com)HO-HUM, MORE BAD NEWS
The latest report about the state of the world’s environment sounds about exactly like the last dozen or so reports we’ve received in the past few years. This one, published in the magazine Nature and funded by the United Nations Environment Program, is titled "Extinction Risk From Climate Change," and warns that over a million of the world’s species of plants and animals could face extinction before the year 2050. Scientists studied six of the world’s bi-diversity-rich regions, representing about 20 per cent of the Earth’s land area, and concluded that between 15 to 37 per cent of the species in those regions face extinction if climate change continues as projected. The study’s lead author, professor Chris Thomas of the University of Leeds, concluded "If the projections can be extrapolated globally, and to other groups of land animals and plants, our analysis suggest that well over a million species could be threatened with extinction." He also warned that up a billion people face life-threatening changes due to climate change in the next 50 years. (BBC)
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