January 20, 2000
CHEMTRAIL UPDATE
The Spotlight has published an interview
with an Air Force and National Security Agency veteran who reveals that the
mysterious "chemtrails" that have been sighted over hundreds of North American
cities are caused by the Pentagon's Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency,
who are testing the aerial distribution of anti-bacterialogical warfare
chemicals as a countermeasure against terrorist attacks using toxic agents
such as anthrax, influenza or other biological pathogens. In other words, the
Pentagon is inoculating us against future biological terrorism (secretly, so
we don't freak out).
WHO SAID CELL PHONES WEREN'T HAZARDOUS TO YOUR
HEALTH?
The first recorded example of "mobile phone rage" has hit
in Germany. A 42-year-old man drinking in a Hamburg beer garden continually
received calls on his phone which played, according to witnesses, an
"irritating melody" when it rang. Other patrons complained about the ringing,
and when the man refused to stop using his phone, he was clubbed to death with
a beer bottle. (Deutsche Telegraph)
FINISH YOUR LUNCH BEFORE YOU READ THIS
For your
amusement, three cases out of God knows how many involving human and animal
feces (and worse) in your food: 1) Between August 1998 and March 1999,
excrement from staff toilets was plumbed into the production line at a cattle
feed factory in France. An estimated 15 to 20 tonnes of human and other sewage
sludge was mixed each week into feed for chickens, pigs and sheep. 2) Cattle
at Great Farm, in England, have for years been grazing on land laden with
sewage. Three lagoons, lined with polythene and holding about a million
gallons of sewage sludge, chemicals and bacteria lie on the land, and
thousands of gallons of this toxic soup of leached into the farmland. 3) The
Belgian Government recently admitted that human and animal waste was being
mixed into animal feed until early 1999. As a result, waste from
slaughterhouses, toilets and showers ended up in Belgium's food chain.
Delicious! (Nexus)
YOU GO GIRL!
Tamara Sanowar-Makhan had her sculpture,
entitled "Ultra-Maxi Priest" banned from an Oakville, Ontario art exhibit last
September. The life-size Catholic vestment was made of 200 maxi-pads, to
symbolize, the artist said "the oppressive control by organized religion over
the freedom of girls and women." (UPI)
MESSING WITH MOMMY NATURE
Genetic scientists have
revealed a plan to create cows that produce human breast milk. Within three
years they foresee adding cows milk that contains a protein component of human
milk to infant formula to make it more like the "real thing" (that is,
mother's milk, not Coca-Cola, I think). Their ultimate goal is to eliminate
the animal protein in cows' milk altogether and replace it with human protein,
to create a cow that gives human milk. And the children of the future will
have a strange fondness for eating grass. (London Express)
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE FROM THE WORLD OF FREAKY
SCIENCE
Scientists from the Roslin Institute in Edinburgh, who
created "Dolly" the world's first cloned sheep, are setting up the world's
first clone farm in New Zealand. Their plan is to create 1,500 genetically
engineered cows that will produce medicine in their milk.
(Sightings)
WHEN THE SHIT HITS THE CAR
A man in Seville, Spain,
narrowly escaped death when a nine pound block of frozen human excrement
ejected from a passing aircraft landed on his car mere seconds before he was
about to climb in. (Reuters)
BAD PENIS, BAD!
A previously convicted sex offender in
St. Paul, Minnesota, cut off his penis, then called 911. He told police that
he "was tired of it giving him trouble." (St. Paul Pioneer Press)
HEARTWARMING QUOTE OF THE WEEK
Hong Kong's Cheng
Mingnewspaper quotes Chinese Defense Minister Chi Haotian: "Seen from the
changes in the world situation and the United States' hegemonic strategy for
creating monopolarity, war is inevitablewe cannot avoid itChinese armed
forces must control the initiative in this warwe must be prepared to fight
for one year, two years, three years or even longer."
THE COMMUTE WILL KILL YOU
An ad in the back of a
magazine has an English company offering "Lunar Land For Sale." For just 10
pounds per acre, you can be the first to own a plot of land on the moon. The
ad says "lunar land is limited, so don't delay." And, in finer print, "planets
also available." Now there's a wise investment.
HAVE ANOTHER DIET COKE
Some telling results from The
Center for Behavioral Medicine,which surveyed 166 studies of Aspartame:
100 per cent of the 74 studies that had Nutrasweet®-industry-related funding
attested to aspartame's safety, whereas 92 per cent of the independently
funded studies identified problems with the synthetic sweetener.
MY, WHAT A LOVELY NEW FACE YOU HAVE
Dr. Gordon Tobin, a
leading American plastic surgeon, states that the world's first face
transplant will soon take place. The process of removing the face of a
recently deceased donor and grafting it onto a living patient would help those
suffering from severe burns or deformities. (Bizarre)
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Copyright 2000 by Andreas Ohrt (604) 803-7485
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com