January 13, 2000

WHEN YOU REALLY, REALLY GOTTA GO

A Victoria man's invention was hailed as the most promising new product at Seattle's Euthanasia Technology Conferencein November. John Hofsess' invention, the "DeBreather", is a mask and hose that runs to a jar containing a substance which filters out carbon dioxide, making for, apparently, a "quick and painless" way to die. Where's the glamour in that? (MSNBC)

SIC 'EM, RUDOLPH

A Chilean man, dressed as Santa and on his way to deliver gifts and candies to a town just north of Santiago, was pelted with rocks by children as he drove by when he refused to throw down his goods. As some kids ran beside the truck throwing rocks, others climbed aboard and stole toys out of his sack before running away. (Reuters)

DEAD GIVEAWAY

In November, three South Africans were arrested after trying to sign a corpse up for pension benefits. They propped up their recently deceased friend at the "illiterate" window of the government office, claiming that he was "ill." Since they didn't have the good fortune of living in a TV sitcom, the clerk quickly noticed the man was, indeed, dead. (South African Press Association)

HAPPY NEW YEAR, AND GOOD RIDDANCE

British officials are reporting divorces in "unprecedented numbers" as the millennium has begun, in what psychotherapists have dubbed "clean slate syndrome", a new determination to question relationships or start afresh as the millennium changes over. (The Guardian)

AND A MECHANICAL ARM WILL PULL YOUR CELL PHONE FROM YOUR EAR

British researchers are working on a satellite-mounted device that could monitor the speed of your car and automatically slow you down if you exceed the speed limit. The system would use geo-positioning technology to locate each car, an in-car computer loaded with a road map and speed limits for each road and a device to cut off the gas from going to the car's engine if it is speeding. According to the researchers, this technology could be standard across the European Union in as little as ten years. (Sightings)

A FEW GRAMS SHORT OF A KILO

22-year-old Norman Hardy Jr. had just pleaded innocent to charges of cocaine possession in a courtroom in Brattleboro, Vermont. Now it was time to fill out the form requesting a public defender. Under "Occupation", he wrote "selling drugs." (AP)

THAT'S FOREVER IN HUMAN YEARS

A couple who wish to clone their 12-year-old border collie has donated $2.3 million to a research team in order to set up a gene bank for pet DNA. The team includes Mark Westhusin, who has already cloned a cow, and Duane Kraemer, a biologist who has started a DNA bank of endangered species cells for future cloning should they become extinct. (San Francisco Chronicle)

HOPE THE DON'T SELL SHOWER HEADS

A Taiwanese distributor has chosen to stop its advertising campaign using Adolf Hitler's smiling face to promote a German-made space heater, which promised to "Declare War on the Cold Front." (UPI)

SCRABBLE WORD OF THE WEEK

Lithopaedion: the rocklike remains of a fetus hardened by calcium buildup, lodged inside a woman's abdomen. Say what? Taiwanese doctors found only the third case of one of these in recorded medical history last week inside a 76-year-old woman. The "fossilized" fetus in her abdomen was conceived 49 years ago, and died in it's 20th week when it moved from her womb to her abdomen. (Reuters)

DON'T THINK TOO HARD

At President Clinton's White House new year's party, reporters asked some of the 350 guests for their thoughts on the past century. Mary Tyler Moore was asked her opinion of the most important invention of the 20th century. "I think the blow dryer," she said. (AP)

GUILT FREE ADULTEROUS SEX AND$200-SWEET

A man in Zambia who had second thoughts after accusing his wife of being infertile and betting her $200 that she could not conceive before February 22 no matter how many men she slept with will now have to let his wife be as adulterous as she wishes. Judges in the Zambian High Court ruled "there is clear indication that you have allowed your wife to have sex with other men. The bet remains a bet." (Times of Zambia)

THE BRIGHT SIDE OF GENETIC ENGINEERING

University of Pennsylvania plant biochemist Philip Rea, Ph.D., has isolated a plant gene in the plant Arabiodopsis Thanliana that encourages the plant to soak up toxins. With this breakthrough, his research team hopes to "genetically enhance" plants such as sugar beets and potatoes to clean up soil at toxic waste sights. (UPI)

WHEN YOUR NUMBER'S UP, DON'T BOTHER FLEEING

A Swedish man who barely escaped from his burning cabin with not even a single stitch of clothing froze to death a mere four kilometres away, naked on his snowmobile. (Daily Aftonbladet)

THEY'RE NOT BITTER

502 Iranian hardliners (and 6 winners from outside of Iran) have offered to sell one of their kidneys to pay for the murder of British author Salman Rushdie, who the late Ayatollah Khomeini condemned to death 10 years ago. (UPI)

January 13, 2000

WHEN YOU REALLY, REALLY GOTTA GO

SIC 'EM, RUDOLPH

DEAD GIVEAWAY

HAPPY NEW YEAR, AND GOOD RIDDANCE

British officials are reporting divorces in "unprecedented numbers" as the millennium has begun, in what psychotherapists have dubbed "clean slate syndrome", a new determination to question relationships or start afresh as the millennium changes over. (The Guardian)

AND A MECHANICAL ARM WILL PULL YOUR CELL PHONE FROM YOUR EAR

A FEW GRAMS SHORT OF A KILO

22-year-old Norman Hardy Jr. had just pleaded innocent to charges of cocaine possession in a courtroom in Brattleboro, Vermont. Now it was time to fill out the form requesting a public defender. Under "Occupation", he wrote "selling drugs." (AP)

THAT'S FOREVER IN HUMAN YEARS

HOPE THE DON'T SELL SHOWER HEADS

A Taiwanese distributor has chosen to stop its advertising campaign using Adolf Hitler's smiling face to promote a German-made space heater, which promised to "Declare War on the Cold Front." (UPI)

SCRABBLE WORD OF THE WEEK

DON'T THINK TOO HARD

At President Clinton's White House new year's party, reporters asked some of the 350 guests for their thoughts on the past century. Mary Tyler Moore was asked her opinion of the most important invention of the 20th century. "I think the blow dryer," she said. (AP)

GUILT FREE ADULTEROUS SEX AND$200-SWEET

THE BRIGHT SIDE OF GENETIC ENGINEERING

WHEN YOUR NUMBER'S UP, DON'T BOTHER FLEEING

A Swedish man who barely escaped from his burning cabin with not even a single stitch of clothing froze to death a mere four kilometres away, naked on his snowmobile. (Daily Aftonbladet)

THEY'RE NOT BITTER

502 Iranian hardliners (and 6 winners from outside of Iran) have offered to sell one of their kidneys to pay for the murder of British author Salman Rushdie, who the late Ayatollah Khomeini condemned to death 10 years ago. (UPI)

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