August 29, 2002
CROP...CIRCLE?
Either the aliens are getting tired of waiting for us to decode their
symbols, or the crop circle pranksters are getting more creative.
This bizarre crop circle, which from the air obviously looks like an
alien face, was discovered on Aug. 15 near Hampshire, UK. Crop circle
researchers seem divided as to whether this one seems real or is a
hoax. Check out the research at www.cropcircleresearch.com.
<IS THIS SCIENCE OR JUST AN EXCUSE TO GET DRUNK?
Thank the gods that
we have bored scientists to explain to us what we already know. A
group of psychologists at Glasgow University took it upon themselves
to study 120 male and female subjects in order to analyze the common
sociological experience known to use uneducated drunks as the "beer
goggle effect." After serving up four "units of alcohol" to half of
the research volunteers, they concluded that the slightly inebriated
subjects found members of the opposite sex 25 per cent more
attractive then those who were still sober. As we used to say in high
school, "fuckenduh!" (Reuters)
OR MAYBE THEY'RE INSECTS FROM OUTER SPACE
Villagers in the Indian
state of Uttar Pradesh are in hysterics after a rash of recent
unexplained attacks in the night which have left at least seven
people dead and many others with burns and other unexplained
injuries. Eyewitnesses claim that "mysterious flying objects," are
the source of the attacks. A neighbour of one of the victims
described the object at "a big soccer ball with sparkling lights,"
saying that the object attacked his victim and ripped open his
stomach. The police have another story altogether. They blame a
"three-and-a-half-inch long winged insect" which leaves rashes and
superficial wounds," according to police superintendent Kavindra P.
Singh. (AP)
THE BEST REASON TO SAVE MONEY FOR YOUR OLD AGE
A 72-year-old
playboy/discotheque owner in Berlin has figured out a way to get a
lot more sex before he kicks the bucket. He has written a will which
promises that the last woman who sleeps with him before he dies will
receive an inheritance of about US$244,000. "I want to pass away in
the most beautiful moment of my life," explained Rolf Eden. "First a
lot of fun with a beautiful woman, then wild sex, a final orgasm -
and it will all end with a heart attack and then I'm gone." He urges
woman to have sex with him as soon as possible, because, he says "it
could end very soon, maybe even tomorrow. (Reuters)
DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER, AND SO IS DEATH
A company called LifeGem is
offering up a service to turn your dead relatives into diamonds. The
company has perfected a technique by which it takes the carbon left
over by a human body after it is cremated, and turns it into a
.25-carat blue diamond. The process takes about 16 weeks, in which
the remains are heated to about 3,000 degrees Celsius and then
pressed under intense pressure and heat to create the synthetic
diamond. The cost is about $4,000. The company figures it will hit it
big in Japan, where about 98 per cent of stiffs are cremated. Check
it out at lifegem.com.
BONEHEAD CRIMINAL OF THE WEEK
A man who had successfully pulled off
insurance fraud by arranging to have his truck stolen and then
collecting $7,000 in insurance money, was busted after he bragged
about his scam to a morning radio show which asked listeners to call
in and tell about the biggest lie they had ever told. An FBI
investigator who was listening to the program figured out who it was
on the line and had him arrested. (dumbcrooks.com)
BUT HOW DO I TRACK MY KID'S DRUG CONSUMPTION?
A company selling a
gadget called CarTracker is trying to market the device to parents of
teenagers who want to track their kids' whereabouts when they lend
them the vehicle for the night. CarTracker is a GPS receiver which
you can attach to your car and which will track the location of the
car to within 30 feet. The manufacture says this: "Want to know the
whereabouts of your teenager? CarTracker is designed to be concealed
within the vehicle, allowing you to record the complete travel
activities of any vehicle anywhere anytime including the address of
each destination, names of streets traveled, how long the vehicle
remained at each location, and whether the driver was speeding." You
can pick on up for about $1000 at www.pimall.com.
(Washington Times)
ADBUSTERS TV
Adbusters has launched their new internet TV show,
ABTV, and is starting things off with a contest looking for video,
audio and animation clips for the show. "The next time you and your
friends organize a street party, liberate a billboard, shoot an indy
documentary, or throw a pie into the ugly face of authority, we want
people worldwide to catch it," they say on their website. The contest
offers up $3000 in prize money, in three categories: Direct Action;
Epiphanies; and Mini-Documentaries. Get the low-down at
www.adbusters.org.
Go to:
Copyright 2002 by Andreas Ohrt
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com
