April 25, 2002
END TIMES ALERT!
A red heifer born in Israel may signal the end of the
world, according to devout Jews and Christians in Jerusalem. The young cow,
certified kosher on April 5, will be watched closely, and if the calf remains
red, may be sacrificed in a purification ritual required by the Old Testament in
order to begin buiding the third Temple, the Holy of Holies. This act will bring
the coming of the Messiah and the Day of Judgement, approximately 35 months from
now. Pictures of the heifer and details of our the coming apocaplyse can be found
at templeinstitute.org.
TAKE THAT, YOU PLASTIC SLUT
Police in Oregon are
seeking the owner of an extremely life-like latex and silicone blow-up doll which
had been dumped in the woods execution-style. The doll was found by two teenagers
with its hands bound and its head missing, wearing only fish-net stockings,
wrapped in a blanket and halfway submerged under water. Police estimate that the
custom-made doll was worth around $6000, and believe that the doll's "execution"
was probably carried out by a jealous lover. Brent Turvey, a criminal profiler,
thinks it would be unlikely for the doll's owner to dump such an expensive sex
toy. "I think you're going to find some ugly domestic thing at the end of this,"
he concluded. (Portland Press Herald)
FOR YOUR CONNECTING FLIGHT TO
JUPITER
The Brazilian town of Bocaiuva do Sul has unveiled plans to build the
world's first UFOport, in order to give UFOs a safe and convenient place to land
when they come to visit Earth. Elcio Berti, the mayor of the town, claims to have
been in negotiations with extraterrestrials for years, and has even received
funding from them to help build the port. The project begins in May and will be
ready in November. (Agent France Presse)
HOLY BATCANE BATMAN!
Inventors
at Leeds University have developed a white cane for blind people based on the
same principles which bats use to navigate. The "Batcane" gives out bursts of
high-frequency sound which bounce back to sensors in the cane. The sensors then
cause one of four pads in the handle to vibrate, letting the user know if the
obstacle is to the left, to the right, directly in front, or above. As the object
gets nearer the vibrations speeds up. (London Times)
ACT NOW AND I'LL
THROW IN MY NEGLECTED HOUSE PLANTS
A woman in Oklahoma is facing charges of
child trafficking after she offered to trade her 7-month-old daughter for a $200
Chihuahua puppy. Later, she changed her mind and asked for $2000 in cash. The
owner of the puppy said she accepted the trade because the baby seemed to be
suffering from neglect. (The Oklahoman)
NOT QUITE PLAYING WITH A FULL
LIGHTER
The police chief of Lanesboro, Minnesota has been charged with nine
counts of first-degree arson after he admitted to setting a fire which destroyed
two century-old buildings. The police chief resigned after he confessed to
investigators that he had planned to set fire to his ex-girlfriend's building,
then rescue her and her baby, then put out the fire before it got out of control.
He had hatched the plan so that he would be seen as a hero and win the love and
admiration of his ex. Unfortunately, the fire he started melted gas meters which
released natural gas and send the fire out of control. (Twin Cities Pioneer
Press)
WORLD'S WORST PLACE FOR PICNIC
A team of Swiss, French and Danish scientists
have uncovered the largest co-operative unit of ants ever recorded. A colony of
billions of Argentine ants, living in millions of nests, stretches over 5,000
kilometres from the Italian Riviera to northwest Spain. (UPI)w
ALEX JONES VERSUS THE NEW WORLD ORDER
Now you don't want to get this guy off on a rant, but for a healthy dose
of anti-global elite rage, you can now download the entire 2 hour and
20 minute film by
Alex Jones, 911: The Road to Tyranny, at www.infowars.com. Despite its
disturbed and paranoid tone, The Road to Tyranny still manages to deliver
a convincing indictment of the sick criminals behind the New World Order.
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Copyright 2002 by Andreas Ohrt
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com