October 18, 2001
BERT IS EVIL
In one of the strangest twists in recent memory, an image of
an angry looking Bert (from Sesame Street's Ernie and Bert) has made it on
to posters carried by anti-American protesters in Pakistan (look over Osama's left shoulder).
It's assumed that the makers of the poster pulled images of bin Laden off
the web, and inadvertently pulled an image that included "Evil Bert" from
one of the mirror sites of the original Bert is Evil website. That site,
which has been shut down since the Sesame Workshop threatened to sue any
site with unauthorized uses of copyrighted images, was originally launched
in 1996 and included doctored images of Bert with Adolf Hitler and the Ku
Klux Klan. Since Sept. 11, images of Bert at the World Trade Centre, Bert
with a bomb, and Bert with a box cutter have been circulating on the web.
(San Francisco Chronicle/San Francisco Gate)
SICK, EVIL BASTARDS
An article entitled Suppressed Details of Criminal
Insider Trading Lead Directly into the CIA's Highest Ranks, posted at
www.copvcia.com lays, out "abundant and clear evidence that a number of
transactions in financial markets indicated specific (criminal)
foreknowledge of the Sept. 11 attacks..." Are you following this? Members of
the CIA had prior knowledge that terrorist attacks were coming, and used
this knowledge to make stock market trades in the days leading up to Sept.
11 which earned them profits in the millions after the terrorist attacks.
The Israeli Herzliyya International Policy Institute for Counterterrorism
lists at least six such transactions by those in the know, in an article
entitled Black Tuesday: The World's Largest Insider Trading Scam? And the
San Francisco Chronicle, on Sept. 29, reported that "investors have yet to
collect more than $2.5 million in profits they made trading options in the
stock of United Airlines before Sept. 11...the uncollected money raises
suspicions that the investors...had advance knowledge of the strikes." The
entire sordid relationship between the CIA, bankers and brokers is laid
out in painful detail at www.copvcia.com.
TRUTH IN POLITICS
Jo Moore, a senior government advisor in Britain is
under pressure to resign after news leaked that just hours after the
attack on Sept. 11, she sent an email to her colleagues advising them that
this would be "a good day to get out anything we want to bury." She meant,
of course, that any news that would be potentially damaging to the
government would be ignored if it was reported in the days after the
terrorist attack. (London Times)
KA-CHING!
A company who had planned to develop a parachute for bailing
out of high-rise apartments and office buildings, but decided against it
because they believed the market was too small, has now released the
"Executive Chute," which will allow someone to leap to safety from a
height of ten stories or more. The chute sells for $795. (UPI)
GIVE PEACE A COOL BILLION
Despite fears raised after 9/11, the Maharishi
Mahesh Yogi is going ahead with the construction of an enormous 144-story
pyramid-shaped skyscraper in the heart of India. He believes the structure
will not be threatened, because "all the pundits meditating and chanting
Vedic mantras there will generate positive energy and no harm will come to
us." The Maharishi went on to say that instead of going to war, Bush
should give his organization $1 billion in order to employ 4,000 young
Hindu men to create a positive atmosphere of world peace for our planet.
(Reuters)
HOW TO CREATE MONSTERS
Have you wondered where terrorists may have gotten
a hold of Anthrax? No surprise here: between 1985 and 1989 the U.S.
government sold anthrax germs to Saddam Hussein in order to have him test
the biowarfare agent under war conditions against Iran. Yet another
brilliant strategy, that was. (www.rense.com)
NOT EXACTLY STELLAR SCIENCE
Each year the Ig Nobel Awards are handed out
to "honour people whose achievements cannot or should not be reproduced.
This year's winners include scientists who studied these fascinating
topics: Injuries Due to Falling Coconuts; An Ecological Study of Glee in
Small Groups of Preschool Children; Black Holes fulfill all the technical
requirements to be the location of Hell; and A Preliminary Survey of
Rhinotillexomania (nose-picking) in an Adolescent Sample."
(www.improbable.com)
PENIS POLL
In an effort to stop the epidemic of broken condoms (nudge
nudge, wink wind, say no more) that seems to be plaguing India, that
nation's Health Ministry has begun a scientific study to find measure the
average penis size of Indian men. The co-ordinator of this project claims
"understanding the length and width of the male organ in different parts o
the country could help bring down the 15-20% failure rate of condoms
because of breakage or spillage." (Indian Express)
GANGA GAMES
If you really want to take your mind off the state of the
world (and you're not afraid to fly), time to book tickets to Amsterdam
for the !4th Annual Cannabis Cup festival being held Nov. 18-22. For just
$250, you can be one of 2000 judges who will pick this year's best
marijuana. The event is organized by High Times magazine, whose editor
claims that "people who use pot are the most creative, intelligent and
compassionate people on the planet."
KEEP YOUR SNAKE ON A LEASH
Tom Martin of San Francisco used to have a pit
bull terrier and a Burmese python - until the python escaped from its cage.
Martin found the 200-pound snake under his house, with a newly acquired
30-pound bulge in its gut. So long, pit bull. (Reuters)
Go to:
Copyright 2001 by Andreas Ohrt
(604) 603-4699
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com
