October 4, 2001
THE MOTHER OF ALL SARCASM
Leave it to Saddam Hussein to come
up with the first volley of dark, dark humour since the
terrorist attack in New York. The Iraqi president told the BBC
that the United States should have requested Iraq's help in
rescuing those buried under the World Trade Centers, as his
country had acquired great expertise in rescuing victims due to
U.S. bombings during the Gulf War. He went on to state that
Iraq would have been happy to help restore water, electricity
and telephone service in New York, as the Iraqis have become
experts in restoring essential services though years of
experience gained after thousands of tons of bombs were dropped
on Iraq by the U.S.
WHERE'S ECHELON WHEN YOU REALLY NEED IT?
Where was Echelon
while those psychos were planning their attack? You know, the
satellite system that records every phone call, email, and fax
transmission worldwide. I guess it's true that it's been used
more for industrial espionage than finding terrorists. Money
talks, after all. The F.B.I. even let it slip that they were
using recordings of cell phones from people on board the doomed
flights as evidence, unwittingly admitting that yes, indeed,
all phone calls are recorded. That's comforting. Anyway, I
wonder if Jam Echelon Day is going to continue. The plan had
been, on Oct. 21, to send out as many messages with "trigger
words" as possible, in order to crash the system. Somehow I
think it'll be cancelled. I'll keep you updated.
BUSINESS AS USUAL
Remember that scene in Fight Club where the
protagonist explains his job for "a major car company"? Well, I
finally found the case on which that was based, in the book You
Are Being Lied To. Get this: In 1973, the Ford Motor Company
knew that some of its models leaked fuel when they turned over
- leading to fires and explosions - and that this could be
fixed by installing an $11 valve. Ford crunched the numbers
and figured that if they did nothing, the fuel leakage would
result in 180 deaths, 180 serious injuries and 2,100 burned
vehicles. Then they figured that each death would cost them an
average of $200,000 in legal fees, settlements, etc.; each
serious injury would cost them $67,000; and each burned vehicle
would result in a $700 tab. Total cost: $49.5 million. On the
other hand, recalling 12.5 million vehicles and replacing an
$11 valve would cost $137 million. It was cheaper to do
nothing, so they did nothing. Heartwarming, ain't it? (Mother
Jones)
A SMALL PRICE TO PAY
In an effort to reintroduce "chastity and
traditional values," the king of Swaziland has forbidden Swazi
men from having sex with teenage girls for the next five years.
A fine of one cow will be levied on any Swazi girl who becomes
pregnant out of wedlock, and any man who impregnates and
unmarried teenage girl over the next five years. (Reuters)
EAT WELL AND MEDITATE, OR GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL
A group of
volunteers at a Mexico City prison will soon be testing whether
a diet rich in iron and calcium will reduce violent behaviour,
based on studies done by the California-based Violence Research
Foundation. A previous experiment on 133 American prisoners
found that violence fell by 38 per cent during a six-month
dietary trial. Meanwhile, in various prisons worldwide, a form
of Vipassana Meditation has been tested at a number of prisons
and found that prisoners who meditate were less prone to
depression, feelings of hostility or hopelessness, and were
less likely to form drug or alcohol addictions. (BBC/Reuters)
FOR THE VOYEUR AND MASOCHIST WITHIN
Ugghhh.... I just
overdosed on creepiness over at www.psychoexgirlfriend.com.
Seems that this guy, Mark, was receiving so many freaky
messages from his ex he decided to share his pain with the
world, and set up this site where you can hear all of her
chillingly psychotic voicemails. Very strange entertainment,
indeed. Be warned, it's highly unpleasant.
NO, REALLY, PLANE TRAVEL IS SAFE
I really meant to write about
this site before Sept. 11, but what can you do? I guess it's
not quite as funny anymore, but that's tough. Click on over to
amigoingdown.com, where you have the chance to fill in the
information for any plane travel you plan on doing, and the
happy little computer will tell you what your chances are of
going down. Cute, isn't it? I plugged in a proposed trip to Las
Vegas in November, and have a 1 in 4 million chance of
crashing. They didn't calculate for terrorists, of course, so I
guess that skews the odds somewhat.
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Copyright 2001 by Andreas Ohrt
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Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
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