September 6, 2001
IS THERE ANYBODY OUT THERE?
Incredible hoax or incredible first
contact. Those are the options after two amazing images appeared‹crop
circle style‹in the fields near the Chilbolton radio telescope in
Hampshire, UK on August 17th. One image is of a humanoid face, while the
other is a replica of the schematic contained in the transmission that
Earth scientists sent out on November 16, 1974 from the Arecibo radio
telescope in Puerto Rico. That transmission was a kind of "message in a
bottle" for other planets to learn about Earth. Here's hoping someone
found the message.(www.psyopnews.com)
SPAWN OF SATAN
The Extra Daily newspaper in Ecuador reports that a
formerly "shy, home-loving girl" became possessed by the devil during a
Ouija board session and is now pregnant with Satan's child. According to
her husband, Vicente Suárez, the foetus "looked nothing like a human
baby" on the ultrasound. He also claims that his wife has suffered
episodes of demonic possession in which she gains superhuman strength
and screams "let me out" in a satanic voice. "When the Devil is in
possession of her body, she spits at anyone who approaches. She kicks
out and she drinks urine as if it were water," he added. Residents from
the village are raising money for a medical exam and exorcism. (Ananova)
SORRY TO BREAK IT TO YOU
Sex researcher Dr. Terrance Hines from Pace
University in New York has published a report in the American Journal of
Obstetrics and Gynecology stating that the G-spot, long considered a
sort of holy grail for women's orgasms, does not exist. "The scientific
evidence that is usually cited to support the existence of a G-spot is
so inadequate to be almost laughable," he says, claiming that studies of
the interior vaginal wall have failed to find an area of nerve tissue
that could be responsible for the sensations believed to be caused by
G-spot stimulation. This latest report calls the G-spot "a sort of
gynecological UFO: much searched for, much discussed, but unverified by
objective means." Or maybe you're just not doing it right, Terrance.
(Reuters Health)
NO WONDER I'M BROKE ALL THE TIME
An economist from the University of
Texas has released extensive research from the United States, Canada,
and China, which he claims proves conclusively that beautiful people
earn more money than the rest of us. His studies suggest that people in
the top 30 per cent in the looks department earn between three and five
per cent more than those in the middle 60 per cent. People in the bottom
ten per cent do even worse. Those described as "pretty ugly" earn up to
ten per cent less than average. (Sightings)
HUNTING FOR PUBLICITY
30-year-old Simon Garth of Myrtle Beach, South
Carolina has shot and killed a Sasquatch and claims that its corpse is
now in his freezer, as he waits for bids from TV stations to buy the
creature. Apparently, while Garth was on a camping trip, the
six-foot-tall, 285-pound Bigfoot threw rocks at him, so he shot it and
brought it home. (UPI)
OOPS! DROPPED A BOMB
Despite the Pentagon's attempt to conceal the
truth, a recently declassified memo reveals that a hydrogen bomb that
the U.S."lost" during a collision of Air Force planes off the coast of
Georgia in 1958 has still not been found. Military crews spent six
months combing the area, but then were called away to South Carolina,
where yet another bomb had been lost, this time accidently dropped from
a B-47. After that incident, the search never resumed in Georgia, the
Pentagon choosing instead to begin a media blackout and pretend it never
happened. According to www.inthesetimes.com, the U.S. has lost 11
nuclear weapons since 1945.
TAKE YOUR DAMN TOY AND SHUT THE HELL UP
A former Hooters waitress in
Florida is suing the restaurant where she worked after she won a
beer-selling contest but was awarded a "Toy Yoda" doll instead of the
"Toyota" she was expecting to win. (AP)
FOR THE LITERATE JUNKIE
The Dutch government has produced a glossy
magazine entitled Mainline Lady, aimed at "improving the health and
quality of life of female drug addicts." The glossy mag offers an
extremely specialized brand of fashion, beauty, sex, and health advice.
Editor Jasperine Schupp says "female users are not just skinny hags.
They have lots of interests, and that's what we wanted to reflect in the
magazine." My personal favourites would have to be the "addict makeover"
and the horoscopes section that includes lines like "your dope will
taste better than usual." (www.mainline.org)
BUT I WANT MY OPPONENT TO BE ON DRUGS
The International Federation of
Chess has put pressure on the U.S. Chess Federation to being drug
testing at tournaments in order to help chess qualify as an Olympic
sport. (www.espn.go)
WHY PAY FOR PILLS?
Scientists have long been baffled by the ability of
non-medicinal placebos to create the same relief of symptoms that
pharmaceutical drugs do in up to 40 per cent of patients. It has been
assumed that placebos work purely through a psychological reaction. But
a new study with Parkinson's patients carried out at UBC, has found that
placebos can create a physical biochemical shift in the brain. Patients
were given either a dummy pill or the drug apomorphine, and both were
successful in raising the amount of dopamine in the brain. Researchers
said that the placebo was successful in causing a substantial amount of
dopamine to be release in every patient tested, and in some cases, to "a
magnitude comparable to medication." (New Scientist)
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Copyright 2001 by Andreas Ohrt
(604) 603-4699
Email:aohrt@hotmail.com
Website:www.curioustimes.com
